How to deal with worries, anxiety, and grief: الهمِّ والحزن Anxiety and Grief — 2022 will we have a recession?

With the continuous calamities, from the pandemic in 2020 to the expected recession in 2022, the world has been in continuous anxiety and grief. In this article, I will repeat how the Sunnah and the Quran explain how to deal with Worries, Grief, Calamities, and distress.

Grief and Worries are part of this life.

To them, God will say, `Enter Paradise; no fear shall come upon you, nor shall you grieve.’

Grief is the opposite of Happiness. We all have to experience different degrees of Sadness, Grief, Pain … The only place that does not have Grief and only happiness is Jannah (Paradise in the hear after).

The first thing believers will say when they enter Paradise:

وَقَالُوا الْحَمْدُ لِلَّهِ الَّذِي أَذْهَبَ عَنَّا الْحَزَنَ ۖ إِنَّ رَبَّنَا لَغَفُورٌ شَكُورٌ |

They will say, ‘All praise belongs to Allah, who has removed all grief from us. Indeed Our Lord is all-forgiving, all-appreciative, | Faatir : 34

The state of grief includes all types of non-happiness, such as Sadness, Pain, feeling down, depression, grief, and calamity … Any time things do not go the way you want will be part of this state.

Grief is one of the spiritual/mental sicknesses. It is a state that we have to go through it in our life. Grief is the opposite of Happiness. In our journey to happiness, we need to understand Grief and how to overcome it quickly.

Through the history of the prophet (PBUH), he had passed through it. The year of the Grief when his uncle and his wife died in the same year. Also, when he lost his son Ibrahim.

إن العين تدمع والقلب يحزن ولا نقول إلا ما يرضى ربنا وإنا بفراقك يا إبراهيم لمحزونون

Narrated Anas bin Malik:

We went with Allah’s Apostle (p.b.u.h) to the blacksmith Abu Saif, and he was the husband of the wet-nurse of Ibrahim (the son of the Prophet). Allah’s Apostle took Ibrahim and kissed him and smelled him and later we entered Abu Saif’s house and at that time Ibrahim was in his last breaths, and the eyes of Allah’s Apostle (p.b.u.h) started shedding tears. `Abdur Rahman bin `Auf said, “O Allah’s Apostle, even you are weeping!” He said, “O Ibn `Auf, this is mercy.” Then he wept more and said, “The eyes are shedding tears and the heart is grieved, and we will not say except what pleases our Lord, O Ibrahim ! Indeed we are grieved by your separation.” (Bukhari and Muslim)

For the Sahabah, their biggest grief was from losing the company of the profit (PBUH) in this life.

I was reading the stories of the prophets and how they suffered:

- Josef was betrayed by his brothers and thrown into the dark well with snakes and scorpions. He was just a young boy hungry and afraid. Then strangers pick him up and sell him as a slave after he was the closest son of the leader of the tripe. He goes to a strange country with strange people and then gets thrown in prison for years. His father, who is the prophet Jacob, spends 30 years in the sadness of the loss of his two close sons until he becomes blind from the grief.

- Ayub spent half of his life sick in bed.

- The prophet Mohammad (PBUH) lived the grief of losing his kids, the lies that were said about his wife, the attacks on his family, and tripe …

All of those are prophets who are close to Allah. Calamities are part of life and not always a punishment. Allah and his prophet taught us how to benefit from those calamities because they will always happen, whether we like them or not.

All calamities lead to four main mental statuses as defined in Quran and Sunnah:

Anxiety and worries for the future — هم

Grief and sadness for the past — حزن

Distress present — gham غم

Affliction كرب two or more of those

We are created anxious, and we panic with calamities

﴿١٩﴾ إِنَّ الْإِنْسَانَ خُلِقَ هَلُوعًا

19. The human being was created anxious.

﴿٢٠﴾ إِذَا مَسَّهُ الشَّرُّ جَزُوعًا

20. Touched by adversity, he is fretful (he panics).

What is the solution?

1. It is a calamity and Sickness (deal with it accordingly)

Patience الصبر

And give good tidings to the patient who, when misfortune befalls them, say, when afflicted with calamity: “To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return”:- (Chapter2 vs156)

وَلَنَبْلُوَنَّكُمْ بِشَيْءٍ مِّنَ الْخَوفْ وَالْجُوعِ وَنَقْصٍ مِّنَ الأَمَوَالِ وَالأنفُسِ وَالثَّمَرَاتِ وَبَشِّرِ الصَّابِرِينَ

Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere,

وبشر الصابرين الذين إذا أصابتهم مصيبة قالوا إنا لله وإنا إليه راجعون أولئك عليهم صلوات من ربهم ورحمة وأولئك هم المهتدون

give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere,Who say, when afflicted with calamity: “To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return”:- They are those on whom (Descend) blessings from Allah, and Mercy, and they are the ones that receive guidance.

إنا لله وإنا إليه راجعون

To Allah, we belong: We are owned By Allah, and he will not harm us. There has to be a wisdom

And to him We will return: One Dip in Paradise will remove any bad memories and the reward will make us appreciate every moment

O Allah, Reward me in my calamity, and give me good out of it (Imagine the good coming out of it)

It is happening anyway; why do not take the reward?

قال صلى الله عليه وسلم : « يودّ أهل العافية يوم القيامة حين يُعطى أهل البلاء الثواب لو أن جلودهم كانت قُرضت في الدنيا بالمقاريض » (صحيح الجامع : 8177)

رابط المادة: http://iswy.co/e46qn

Jabir reported God’s messenger as saying, “On the day of resurrection, when people who have suffered affliction are given their reward, those who are healthy will wish their skins had been cut to pieces with scissors when they were in the world.” https://sunnah.com/mishkat:1570

We all ask for protection from calamities, but if it is happening, get a reward.

وقال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم : « عجباً لأمر المؤمن، إنّ أمره كلَّه له خير، إن أصابته سرّاء شكر فكان خيراً له، وإن أصابته ضرّاؤ صبر فكان خيراً له » (أخرجه مسلم)

رابط المادة: http://iswy.co/e46qn

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “How wonderful is the case of a believer; there is good for him in everything and this applies only to a believer. If prosperity attends him, he expresses gratitude to Allah and that is good for him; and if adversity befalls him, he endures it patiently and that is better for him”.

[Muslim]. https://sunnah.com/riyadussalihin:27

َحَدَّثَنِي عَنْ مَالِكٍ، عَنْ رَبِيعَةَ بْنِ أَبِي عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ، عَنْ أُمِّ سَلَمَةَ، زَوْجِ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ، أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ “‏ مَا مِنْ عَبْدٍ تُصِيبُهُ مُصِيبَةٌ فَيَقُولُ إِنَّا لِلَّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ اللَّهُمَّ أْجُرْنِي فِي مُصِيبَتِي وَأَخْلِفْ لِي خَيْرًا مِنْهَا إِلاَّ أَجَرَهُ اللَّهُ فِي مُصِيبَتِهِ وَأَخْلَفَ لَهُ خَيْرًا مِنْهَا ‏” قَالَتْ أُمُّ سَلَمَةَ فَلَمَّا تُوُفِّيَ أَبُو سَلَمَةَ قُلْتُ ذَلِكَ ثُمَّ قُلْتُ وَمَنْ خَيْرٌ مِنْ أَبِي سَلَمَةَ فَأَعْقَبَهَا اللَّهُ رَسُولَهُ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ فَتَزَوَّجَهَا

Malik from Rabia ibn Abi Abd ar-Rahman from Umm Salama, the wife of the Prophet may Allah bless him and grant him peace, that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, “If a misfortune befalls some one and he says, as Allah has ordered, ‘We belong to Allah and to Him we are returning. O Allah, reward me in my misfortune and give me better than it afterwards,’ Allah will do that for him” (Inna lillahi wa innailayhi rajiun. Allahumma’ jurniy fi musiybatiy, wa a qibhiy khayran minha, illafaala ‘llahu dhalika bihi.).

Umm Salama said, “When Abu Salama died I said that, and then I said, ‘Who is better than Abu Salama?’ “ And then Allah left her the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and he married her.

Sahih Muslim 918b

The Woman who suffered from Epilepsy

2. Control circles:

Do your best in what is in your control and trust Allah in what is not in your control

Controlled Part: How did Youssef deal with the expected “Recession”?

قَالَ تَزْرَعُونَ سَبْعَ سِنِينَ دَأَبًا فَمَا حَصَدتُّمْ فَذَرُوهُ فِى سُنۢبُلِهِۦٓ إِلَّا قَلِيلًا مِّمَّا تَأْكُلُونَ

He (- Joseph) replied, `You shall sow for seven years working hard and continuously and let what you have harvested remain in its ear excepting a little whereof you may eat.

Out of Control:

• His brothers come back to him
• His father to find him
• His father’s health
• To save his people
• Egyptians and the king to listen to him
• To get out of the prison

What is in your control today:

1. Work hard to keep your work and make money
2. Save as much as possible except for the necessities (Food, net, …)

What is not in your control:

1. Stock prices
2. If you will stay at work
3. If your work is recognized
4. Your health and your family’s health
5. All other non-expected calamities
6. If you find work
7. If you pass the interviews
8. If you were able to save money before today
9. Anything in the past

3. Monologue, complain, appeal, and Duaa to Allah

للهم إليك أشكو ضعف قوتي، وقلة حيلتي، وهواني على الناس، يا أرحم الراحمين، إلى من تكلني، إلى عدو يتجهمني، أو إلى قريب ملكته أمري، إن لم يكن بك علي غضب فلا أبالي، غير أن عافيتك أوسع لي، أعوذ بنور وجهك الذي أشرقت له الظلمات، وصلح عليه أمر الدنيا والآخرة، أن تنزل بي غضبك، أو يحل علي سخطك، لك العتبى حتى ترضى، ولا حول ولا قوة إلا بك.

•Oh, Allah, I appeal to you for the weakness in my strength,
and my limited power and the treatment of contempt and humiliation from people.
To you, the most Merciful of all the Merciful ones,
you are the Lord of the oppressed, and you are my Lord

•Under whose care are you leaving me to?
To an enemy oppressing me?
Or to a friend you have given control of my affair?
If there is no anger from you on me I will forever be content.
However, your blessing is vastly important for me

•I seek refuge with the glory of your light, which the heavens and earth are lit form, your anger will not befall on me, nor your displeasure descends on me

•To you is the supplication until you are pleased, and there is no control or power except by you

تعتبر مناجاة الله والتوجه إليه من أكثر الأمور التي يجب أن يحرص عليها الإنسان المسلم، لا سيّما في جوف الليل؛ فهي تُقرّب العبد من ربه وتجعله يستجيب لمناجاته وما يرغب، وتكون المناجاة مخاطبةً لله سراً، أو دعاء بين الإنسان ونفسه بحيث يطلب من الله حاجته بقلبٍ طاهرٍ وسليم، وبإخلاصٍ وخشوعٍ تام. فيما يلي نذكر مجموعةً من الكلمات التي يُمكن أن يناجي فيها العبد الله سبحانه وتعالى.

The Monologues of God and asking God are among the most important things that a Muslim should take care of, especially in the end of night. It brings the servant closer to his Lord and makes him respond to his encounters and what he desires, and the Monagah (Monologue) is addressed to God in secret, or supplication between man and himself, so that he asks God for his need with a pure and healthy heart, with sincerity and complete reverence. Below we mention a group of words in which the servant of God Almighty may call.

4. Do not Blame Yourself

أَنَّ مَا أَصَابَكَ لَمْ يَكُنْ لِيُخْطِئَكَ ، وَأَنَّ مَا أَخْطَأَكَ لَمْ يَكُنْ لِيُصِيبَكَ

It is all distined to be, even if you made the wrong decission.

Examples:

1. Selling or Buying Stocks at the wrong time.
2. Not saving money for that day.
3. Not working hard enough to keep your work.
4. Not spending the effort to fix the relationship that you lost

Treat them as a calamity and Move on.5.

5. When you lose balance, get your balance back

When the afflictions and calamities keep coming stronger one after the other, we might lose our balance and give up. The most important thing, in this case, is to make sure you return back to Allah and focus on pleasing him as part of what is in your control. The following series helps in that:

6. Understand the wisdom of the test

A Message to those who are Lost in the Test

هم

ثق بالله وسلم له وتوكل على الله

في الصباح ادعي

اللهم اني اعوذ بك من الهم والحزن

وثق في الله انه يحميك

وسلم لله في ما جرت به المقادير

وتوكل على الله في ان يهديك الى الخير

وما قدروا الله حق قدره

توكل يعني تسليم مع احسان احسن ما في يدك وسلم لله في النتيجة

Gratitude and remember how Allah took care of you to this point

معرفة النعمة

لا حول ولا قوةً الا بالله

الشكاية الى الله

Control circles:

Do your best in what is in your control and trust Allah in what is not in your control

https://ar.wikipedia.org/wiki/%D9%87%D9%85

Do not give things more than what they deserve like Satan compared to the power of Allah

Satan got Adam out of Jannah

Adam talked to Allah

Saw Eve created

Lived in Jannah

Allah told him in his face Satan is your enemy

He was able to see him

1- story of Adam

2- Who is your enemy

3- weapon. Shield, Army, and plan

Get rid of shaytan

Sahih Hadith believe

Other 60% authentic

Time — 15 minutes and you get rid of it. It is worth it

من قال إذا أصبح لا إله إلاَّ الله

وَعَنْ أَبِي سَعِيدٍ الْخُدْرِيِّ قَالَ: قَالَ رَجُلٌ: هُمُومٌ لَزِمَتْنِي وَدُيُونٌ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ قَالَ: «أَفَلَا أُعَلِّمُكَ كَلَامًا إِذَا قُلْتَهُ أَذْهَبَ اللَّهُ هَمَّكَ وَقَضَى عَنْكَ دَيْنَكَ؟» قَالَ: قُلْتُ: بَلَى قَالَ: “ قُلْ إِذَا أَصْبَحْتَ وَإِذَا أَمْسَيْتَ: اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنَ الْهَمِّ وَالْحُزْنِ وَأَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ غَلَبَةِ الدَّيْنِ وَقَهْرِ الرِّجَالِ “. قَالَ: فَفعلت ذَلِك فَأذْهب الله همي وَقضى عَن ديني. رَوَاهُ أَبُو دَاوُد

Abu Sa’id al-Khudri told of a man who said to God’s messenger that he was entangled in cares and debts. He replied, “Shall I not teach you words by which, when you say them, God will remove your care and settle your debt?” and when the man expressed a desire to hear them he told him to say morning and evening, “O God, I seek refuge in Thee from care and grief; I seek refuge in Thee from incapacity and slackness; I seek refuge in Thee from niggardliness and cowardice; I seek refuge in Thee from being overcome by debt and being put in subjection by men.” He said that when he did that God removed his care and settled his debt.

الحياة الطيبة

مَنْ عَمِلَ صَٰلِحًا مِّن ذَكَرٍ أَوْ أُنثَىٰ وَهُوَ مُؤْمِنٌ فَلَنُحْيِيَنَّهُۥ حَيَوٰةً طَيِّبَةً ۖ وَلَنَجْزِيَنَّهُمْ أَجْرَهُم بِأَحْسَنِ مَا كَانُواْ يَعْمَلُونَ

Whoever works righteousness, man or woman, and has Faith, verily, to him will We give a new Life, a life that is good and pure and We will bestow on such their reward according to the best of their actions.

كان النبيُّ ﷺ يقول: اللهم إني أعوذ بك من الهمِّ والحزن، والعجز والكسل، والجبن والبخل، وضلع الدَّين، وغلبة الرِّجال[1]، هذا الحديث أخرجه البخاري في “صحيحه”.

Anxiety and worries for the future — هم

Grief and sadness for the past — حزن

Distress present — gham غم

Affliction كرب two or more of those

References:

Spiritual Health

The Power of Gratitude in Reaching Happiness and Treating Stress, Anxiety, and Depression

Grief and How to Overcome it

(212) دعاء الهم والحزن ..

Grief and How to Overcome it

تخريج حديث: (من قال إذا أصبح: لا إله إلا الله وحده لا شريك له)